10 ways French women practice self-care

French women practice self-care with a kind of quiet expertise. It’s woven into their routines, their culture, and the pace of daily life. Here, self-care isn’t necessarily indulgent, performative, expensive, or something you schedule because you feel guilty. It’s simply part of taking care of yourself — as natural as buying bread or planning the weekend menu.

It’s also more than massages, facials, or long baths with scented candles (though those absolutely count). At its core, the French approach to self-care is about making room for yourself, choosing what feels good, and repeating it often enough that it becomes a habit rather than a special occasion.

Since moving to France more than two decades ago, I’ve slowly adopted many of these practices. It didn’t happen overnight. For years, with three young children, I thought self-care required time, planning, and a babysitter. I genuinely didn’t understand that it could also be five minutes here, ten minutes there — tiny rituals that accumulate and change how you feel.

As I’ve written before, my early self-care routine involved… no care at all. I was either overdoing it with exercise and deprivation or flustered and exhausted in the whirlwind of parenthood. I wasn’t caring for myself in any real way.

It took me a long while to unlearn those automatic habits. Slowly, thanks to a few wise people and, quite frankly, osmosis from living in France, I arrived at a place that feels more balanced and humane.

I’m late to the game, but I’m here. Please don’t wait as long as I did — care for yourself now.

Women often put themselves last. It feels easier, even expected, to focus on children, partners, homes, work, and the endless to-do list before considering our own wellbeing. But taking care of ourselves is a form of respect — for our bodies, our minds, and the people who depend on us.

It isn’t a luxury. And I’ve met many French women who seem to understand that instinctively.

For an overview of everyday French wellbeing habits, start with → The French Approach to Wellbeing.

Here are ten French self-care habits I’ve come to appreciate — simple, nourishing rituals that anyone can weave into a busy life.

1. Saying “No” Is Self-Care

This is a French attitude that still fascinates me. Many French women I’ve known seem perfectly comfortable saying no when something doesn’t suit them. It’s not necessarily rude — it’s honest, and it protects their time.

For years, I thought this was selfish. Now I see that it’s balance.

Instead of cancelling a long-planned facial or skipping yoga to attend yet another school outing, a woman might simply… not go.

Meanwhile, when my kids were in elementary school, I volunteered for practically every outing. I even offered to teach weekly English classes, which — let’s be honest — was a very kind gesture but ridiculously unnecessary.

I had a toddler at home, and once a month would have been far more reasonable.

I’m not saying don’t volunteer. Just don’t lose yourself in the process.

I probably needed to be liked… or maybe being a stay-at-home mom was hard for me to adjust to.

Whatever the reason, I eventually learned that saying no, when needed, is an act of self-care.

2. Scents Matter More Than You Think

France has a long love affair with fragrance, and it’s one of the small pleasures I’ve come to appreciate enormously.

Perfume, a beautifully scented face oil, a candle burning softly in the corner — these are tiny ways to make an ordinary day feel a little more special.

Grasse, in the south of France, is famous for its perfume-making heritage.

And don’t even get me started on Diptyque’s Philosykos, which I’ve worn for more than twenty years, or Fragonard, whose perfumes are always worth exploring when you’re in France.

A favourite scent doesn’t have to be expensive or elaborate. Sometimes it’s simply a pleasure that takes a few seconds.

3. Gastronomic Pleasure — in Moderation

One of the things I’ve learned from living in France is that enjoying food and taking care of yourself don’t have to be opposites.

In the French approach to eating that I admire, pleasure has a place at the table. A good meal is something to enjoy, not something to feel guilty about.

If you’ve read any of my posts on this subject, you know how strongly I feel about it.

When I travel elsewhere, I see people counting macros, eating protein bars, drinking concoctions, and living on strict eating schedules.

Part of me thinks, “Good for them — they care about their health.”

Another part of me wonders, “But where is the pleasure?”

I hope they’re enjoying a homemade dessert once in a while, or a glass of wine if that’s their thing.

Nature gives us such delicious foods. Powders and bars aren’t my thing. I’ve lived in France too long.

That, and I’m not a bodybuilder.

For me, this is self-care rooted in pleasure, not restriction.

Meet some of my French friends and find out more about → What French Women Eat in a Day.

And if you’re interested in the eating habits I’ve adopted here, read → Why French Women Love the Mediterranean Diet.

4. Lingerie as a Confidence Ritual

Here’s a very French idea I love: your underwear is for you.

Matching lingerie, beautiful fabrics, a well-fitting bra — these can be quiet luxuries that make you feel good, even under the simplest outfit.

If you’ve read the story about my visit to the nutritionist after pregnancy, you’ll remember how horrified I was to strip down to undergarments that were… well… not amazing.

They’d been washed on the wrong cycle, with the wrong colours, and had turned that murky watercolour-paintbrush-rinse shade.

They went straight into the garbage.

That day, I got serious about buying nicer things.

You don’t need anything skimpy or extravagant. Just quality, comfortable, pretty pieces that make you feel good.

It works. TRY IT.

5. Enjoying the Now

One of the things I admire about many French women is their ability to enjoy life without waiting for everything to be perfect.

A new dress doesn’t have to wait until they’ve lost a few pounds. They work with what they have, highlight what they love about themselves, and move on.

I know so many chic French women who look absolutely gorgeous — and they are not the ultra-skinny Parisian cliché on Instagram, sipping cappuccinos with a gigantic bouquet and a Sézane dress.

They wear great clothes, throw on a beautiful scarf or cocktail ring, and call it a day.

There’s a wonderful French expression: bien dans sa peau — comfortable in your own skin.

For me, that’s one of the best definitions of self-care.

That same attitude toward confidence and growing older is something I explore in How French Women Age Naturally and Well.

6. Beauty Rituals Are Regular, Not Rare

In France, I’ve often noticed that beauty rituals are approached as care rather than vanity.

A hair appointment, a massage, a simple spa treatment — these don’t always have to be grand occasions. They can be ordinary ways of looking after yourself.

Even the language reflects this. Treatments are called soins — care.

And hairdressers in France? A total dream.

I’ve had some of the best haircuts of my life here.

My hairdresser, Jean-Marc (if you’re reading this), is magic. I still don’t understand how he cuts my wavy hair while chatting in ten minutes flat.

Of course, self-care doesn’t require a salon appointment. It can be as simple as taking the time to do something that makes you feel good.

7. Café Society as a Reset

One of my favourite French habits is the simple pleasure of sitting down for a coffee.

Of course, people in France sometimes drink coffee on the go. But the culture of taking a proper pause is something I’ve noticed again and again.

A small coffee, five or ten minutes, perhaps a little people-watching.

It’s self-care disguised as normal life.

The whole culture of walking around with an enormous drink in hand has never seemed as widespread here as it is in the United States.

I vividly remember when this clicked for me.

Workers were installing a deck at our house. I offered them coffee, and they said, “Yes please, in about ten minutes.”

I brought warm mugs outside, assuming they’d drink them on the spot.

Instead, they walked inside, sat at the kitchen bar, and had a proper coffee break.

Standing up was apparently not an option.

I loved it.

Try taking a real pause for your next coffee or tea. No phone, no multitasking. Just a few minutes to enjoy it.

8. Looking Good to Feel Good

Another habit I’ve picked up in France is the pleasure of getting dressed for yourself.

That doesn’t mean looking glamorous or spending hours getting ready.

It might mean brushed hair, a little lipstick, a well-cut jacket, or an outfit that makes you feel put together.

Many French women I’ve known have a knack for looking polished without appearing overly dressed.

The French style I admire is often unfussy: a touch of blush, natural-looking hair, a favourite accessory.

Of course, there’s no single French beauty ideal, and plenty of women here love elaborate makeup or dramatic fashion.

But personally, I find something refreshing about the idea that looking after your appearance shouldn’t have to become a full-time job.

A little effort can go a long way.

9. Gentle Movement Over Punishment

I’ve never been particularly fond of the phrase “No pain, no gain.”

One of the things I appreciate about everyday life in France is how naturally movement can fit into the day.

Walking to the bakery, weekend hikes, swimming, cycling, or a yoga class — activity doesn’t always need to be a formal workout.

Of course, France has serious athletes, marathon runners, CrossFit enthusiasts, and plenty of women who love strength training.

And strength training is important, especially as we get older.

But movement doesn’t have to feel like punishment to be worthwhile.

Where I live, the rock climbers — including my daughter — have enviable biceps, largely because they’re doing something they love.

That’s an approach to exercise I can get behind.

Find movement you enjoy, make room for it regularly, and let it become part of your life.

10. Skincare Is Everyday Care

French pharmacies are one of my favourite places to browse.

I’ve always been drawn to the idea of a simple, consistent skincare routine rather than an overflowing bathroom cabinet.

A gentle cleanser, moisturiser, sunscreen, and perhaps a treatment suited to your skin — that’s a perfectly good place to start.

Take me to a French pharmacy to browse skincare over a department store any day.

Brands such as Avène offer products at a range of prices, often well below the most expensive luxury beauty counters.

I’m all for luxury if that’s your thing, but I’ll never be convinced that an overpriced cream from Chanel automatically beats Avène.

Seriously.

For me, skincare is about looking after the skin you have, not chasing an impossible idea of perfection.

For more seasonal ideas, read → French Winter Skincare Rituals You Can Steal.

Bonus: Gratitude, the French Way

The French may complain — loudly and often — but I’ve also noticed how much pleasure people take in life’s small delights.

A perfect cheese. A sunny terrace lunch. A fragrant baguette. A beautiful éclair. The smell of rain. A well-made perfume.

These little moments are worth noticing.

And perhaps that’s the biggest lesson I’ve learned about self-care after more than twenty years in France.

It doesn’t always require money, planning, or a special occasion.

Sometimes it’s simply giving yourself permission to enjoy what’s already there.

More From France

If you’re curious about how France nurtures healthier habits — from school lunches to everyday food, movement, and wellbeing — I share practical tips and stories each month. Sign up for the free newsletter below and receive my guide, The French Guide to Everyday Wellbeing, straight to your inbox. Merci!

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